Saturday, 30 April 2016

A thousand bullets

What's the worst thing about me? 
That darkkkk thinking that comes out of nowhere. 
Thinking I'm not good enough, worthless, ugly, unwanted, every bad thought hitting you like a thousand bullets, hence the name of the post. 

I swear it's like I have bipolar. For a few days, I'm fine, content, happy, emotionless, then it snaps and then I'm in this dark place. Stressing myself out to point of being sick, but hey ho, I refuse to go the doctors for that. They're useless. Took me forever get my CFS diagnosis. And I think if I never changed doctors I'd still be trying to change that bloody diagnosis. 

I guess I'm head fucked. So paranoid. Making my thoughts ten times worse that I don't know what to do with myself. 

I'm fighting though. As always. This time for my cats, a cats love beats any. 

No comments:

Post a Comment